Meet the crew
Earth Archive File 1-002: Meet the crew members of the Dellingr, the first of nineteen colonization ships to depart the solar system.
Tomorrow, the Void. Episode One coming soon.
Created by Andrew Santoro and Kelsey Henry. Cover art by Robert James Algeo. Original music by Charlie Van Stee.
Voices: Charlie Van Stee as the Spokesperson; Ro Cornell as Captain Calloway; Yasin Elabdi as XO; Lee Fillingsness as Fyodor; Kelsey Henry as Argus; Andrew Santoro as David; Charles Hubbell as Milton.
Illustrated Transcripts for every episode and in-between are available to all Patreon members.
And here is the plain text transcript:
Meet the Crew
SPOKESPERSON: Hello investors, new and old, and welcome aboard the Dellingr, our first of nineteen colonization ships to depart for our future’s homes. Let’s have a look around, shall we? And meet the fine folk that will lead the charge into tomorrow!
Music cross fades into typing and computer chirps.
SPOKESPERSON: My, my. Look at all the cutting-edge technology in here!
The typing stops.
SPOKESPERSON: Hello, intrepid astronaut. Might you introduce yourself to our new investors?
CALLOWAY: I’m Captain Calloway. I oversee the crew and I’m also the resident information tech onboard.
SPOKESPERSON: You’re a leader of both people and computers.
CALLOWAY: Why thank you!
SPOKESPERSON: Admirable work, Captain Calloway. Speaking of computers…
SPOKESPERSON: I’ve heard tell there’s someone that may want to talk to us.
CALLOWAY: Do you mean our ship’s AI? We call it XO.
A two-note tone sounds: XO’s doo-woop.
SPOKESPERSON: Hello? XO, is it?
XO: Hello, investors. Thank you for your contributions to send the Dellingr into the cold, endless night of space.
SPOKESPERSON: You have a lovely way with words, XO.
SPOKESPERSON: It was nice to meet you. We must get moving, now.
Hydraulic whirrings, buzzings, and blips fade in.
SPOKESPERSON: I think I hear the work of our next crew member. Hello?
FYODOR: Hello. My name is Fyodor. I’m the ship’s resident roboticist, responsible for all robots and robotic apparatus aboard the Dellingr.
SPOKESPERSON: Robots? What are robots doing onboard?
FYODOR: You see, the mission of colonization won’t be complete before we die. The robots have to be capable of picking up where we leave off, and doing everything mere mortals can’t.
SPOKESPERSON: Sounds like a lot of planning.
FYODOR: I’ve trained these machines to live up to my exact specifications. They will continue on long after we have died, to complete the mission in my name. ‘Fyodor’ shall be on the metallic lips of my robotic soldiers as they activate the colonization tanks on new perfect planet.
SPOKESPERSON: I’ll let you get back to work.
FYODOR: I kid of course. They don’t have lips, they’re only arms.
SPOKESPERSON: All right. That’s–
FYODOR: I do rule over them with an iron fist however. That’s no joke. They wouldn’t respect any less.
SPOKESPERSON: Alright, thank–
FYODOR: Because they’re robots!
An airlock door closes. Hydraulic sounds cut.
SPOKESPERSON: Alright… Where to next?
ARGUS: Is it my turn?
SPOKESPERSON: Of course! Silly me, who better to ask where we are going than our next crew member. Say hello!
ARGUS: It’s Argus, I’m Argus. Hello. Um… I’m the navigator. I set the course and maneuver through any variables that may come between us and our destination. No sirens of Titan will lead this ship astray!
SPOKESPERSON: Sirens on Titan? I don’t know if we’ve been briefed on those.
ARGUS: It was just a lame joke. Sorry.
SPOKESPERSON: Oh. I knew that, I love jokes. Did you hear the one about the hero scientist who gave hope to a dying planet?
ARGUS: (DISTANT) Umm, no.
Music fades in.
SPOKESPERSON: Actually, that one’s no joke and thank goodness that it isn’t. Our final crew member you may recognize from the papers, the interviews, the books, the, well, everywhere. He’s our resident hero to bring the population–
DAVID: I’m David.
SPOKESPERSON: Uh. Who are you?
DAVID: (SIGHS) I’m the lead mechanic on the ship.
SPOKESPERSON: Oh. Like a space repairman.
DAVID: It’s not as glamorous as it sounds.
SPOKESPERSON: Well, I’m sure your work is very important, too.
DAVID: It’s a living.
SPOKESPERSON: Anyway, the most important work on the Dellingr is being done by the world’s most important scientist. Creator of the colonization tanks, mind behind the quantum DNA project, and keeper of all of our hearts, I’m proud to introduce the final member of the Dellingr crew, the esteemed Dr. Milton Thrumbull!
MILTON: You’re too kind.
SPOKESPERSON: And humble, to boot! Milton, you’ve created the technology that will restart life on other planets. Why are you heading off with the fleet? Don’t you think you’ve earned some rest, maybe retire with the family to Xenoa Luxury Space Resort?
MILTON: Yes, well I’ve only heard good things about it.
SPOKESPERSON: Xenoa Luxury Space Resort is the solar system’s finest space craft and the only place untouched by Earth’s desolation. Sure you don’t want to live out your days in style and comfort?
Inspirational music swells. A heavenly choir sings.
MILTON: It’s tempting, yes. But I have a need to see this mission through to completion. Or at least as close as I can get to it. I feel as though I owe it to myself and the people who have tried so hard to save our dying planet. This is our last hope. Our dying gasp for help. Our swan song–
The audio distorts. Glitches.
VOICE: Tomorrow, the Void.